Thursday, July 14, 2005

Inside the Blogger's Studio

First, I want to send special messages to two people.
Nick, who is celebrating the two year anniversary of his extremely funny blog today. Woohoo! He also made me his featured blogger for finding his coveted Union Jack cup on the internet. Thanks Nick!
And Neil, who mentions me in his blog today....even if it is through his parents. It's a riot. Thanks Neil!

So, I asked the fabulously handsome and talented Todd to interview me. I will answer the questions shortly, but first, I am contractually obligated to explain the rules to this inquisitive round-robin. I am copying and pasting this directly from Todd, otherwise known as yournamehere and viva las vegASS, because I am lazy.

Here are the instructions:

1. If you want to participate, leave a comment below saying "Interview me." "Blow me" or "Eat me" are not acceptable substitutes.
2. I will respond by asking you five questions - each person's will be different. I'll post the questions in the comments section of this post.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

Here are Todd's questions for me.

1. I know you're a trained chef, so what is your favorite dish to prepare and why? It would have to be soup. I have actually been written up in the newspaper for my soupmaking prowess - and was dubbed alternately "The Soup Queen" and "The Soup Nazi", by customers and coworkers alike. Which name was used for me depended on my level of bitchiness for that particular day. There are people in Jersey who would buy me an automobile for one quart of my Cream of Tomato. Point of interest: soup was invented to get rid of leftovers.

2. If you had to live as a man for an entire week, would you give your penis a name? If so, what? No, that is just creepy. Why do men do that?

3. Explain in detail your favorite aspect of blogging. I love the creative outlet of blogging. I have always loved writing, and I feel like this is not only a great forum to sharpen my skills, but to get almost immediate feedback from people who are not friends and family. (ie: people who would not insult my stuff for fear of hurting my feelings) I am also really enjoying the interaction between bloggers, which has been an unexpected and happy surprise. So many cool, interesting, and inspiring bloggers out there!

OK fine. It's all about the neocounter.


4. Which "Seinfeld" character do you most relate to and why? I think the Seinfeld characters are possibly the most obnoxious ever created for television, with the exception of Frank *Ferret Face* Burns. At first I thought Elaine, being that she is a girl, of course. But Elaine whines too much. She is also a world-class bitch. I'm a bitch too, but not a world-class one. And her dancing is tragic. Kramer is a sponge and a general nuisance, I don't like those qualities in people. He also has bad hair and hangs out with Newman. Ick. George is a jackass, and let's face it, he has really bad hair. If I had to be alone for ten minutes with George I'd kill him. That leaves Jerry. Jerry is funny, entertaining, and is always the center of what is happening. Plus he's rich. I can relate to that even if I am - economically - at the bottom of the food chain.

5. If you're ever in Vegas can I pretend I'm with you so they'll let me in the really nice clubs? You bet! Have cleavage, will travel.

Thanks Todd! You are genius!

49 comments:

Evil Petting Zoo said...

interview me!!

gone said...

Nice answers. And you already have an interviewee, which I don't. I'm jealous of you Brooke, but then again, I was never the popular kid in school so why should things be different now? HA!

Brookelina said...

Ok Evil, here you go!!!

1. Describe a day at the evil petting zoo.

2. If you could relive one day of your life, what day would it be, and why?

3. If you were on the tourism board for Washington State, how would you convince people to come visit.

4. You like the movie "Ferris Beuller's Day Off". If you had to sing on parade float in front of all of Chicago, what song would it be?

5. Not so attractive girl who is great in the sack, or beautiful girl who lays like a lump?

Brookelina said...

Jacob - most of the popular people from high school are now out of work losers still reliving their glory days from once upon a time.

Except me of course.

darth said...

mmmmmm..soup...one of the few dishes that is good at any time, breakfast, lunch, or dinner. or in between.

well, that and bacon.

Rob Danger said...

You really wouldn't name your penis??
I name my breasts and I don't even have any.

Lo Lo Lova said...

Interview me PLEASE!

Brookelina said...

Darth - I am in absolute total agreement!

Flesh - my breasts don't have names. I usually just refer to them as the girls. Or the boobage. I figure if I named my penis I wouldn't get laid. If forced to name it though, I would call it Woody the Wonder Winky.

Lo Lo - I'm working on your interview right now!

Brookelina said...

Ok Lo Lo - here you go!!

1. You have just won a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world. Where would you go and why?

2. If you could guarantee world peace by posting naked pictures of yourself on the internet, would you do it?

3. What is your guilty pleasure? (besides blogging!)

4. You are the new character on General Hospital. Who are you and what is your deep dark secret?

5. Describe a perfect day.

Neil said...

Didn't you once tell before that you nicknamed your boobage "Minestrone" and "Manhattan Clam Chowder?"

(joke courtesy of "The Official Book of "Dirty" Soup Jokes."

Melanie was here said...

I'm scared, but intervew me, please! Notice I didn't say eat me or blow me?!

Lo Lo Lova said...

1) I do not fly. I used to be terrified of flying. Then I was on my honeymoon in Canada, going to fly to Vancouver, and 9/11/01 happened. From that day, I have vowed to never fly again. However, if I ever did get the courage to fly, I would go to Italy and see where my ancestors and my husband's ancestors came from.

2) World peace would occur with simultaneous world vomiting. But yes, I'd do it.

3) Collecting things. Like shoes, DVD's, and jewelry.

4) My name is Lily Farquar. My dark secret is that I was Jason Morgan's sex slave for 10 years. I live in his basement.

5) A perfect day is when both myself and my husband are not working. My son decides to sleep past 7am. We spend the day together. The sun is shining. We take a walk up to the park. We pack a picnic. In the evening, my son takes an extra long nap and my husband and I snuggle on the couch a watch a movie. That night, I go to bed early and sleep for 12 uninterrupted hours. I'm sure hubby would like some nooky, but it's my fantasy, and I'm tired :)

Brookelina said...

Neil - I never said that! But I want that book.

Mel - I thought for sure you would want Lo Lo to interview you!

Brookelina said...

Lo Lo...you are supposed to put this on your blog and then interview other people!

But that's ok. I love your answers Lily.

Brookelina said...

I'm working on your questions now Mel, unless you want Lo Lo instead. I won't be upset.

much

Melanie was here said...

Ah - sure, I can wait for Lo LO and make her do it!

Melanie was here said...

Um, can I do both? Or is that not kosher? Actually Brooke - let's see what you come up with. Lo Lo interviews me every day!

Brookelina said...

Do both!!! That would be too funny! I'm almost done. And you have to post it on your blog.

And thanks for the poopy post. I'm still cracking up.

Melanie was here said...

Very glad you liked the poopy post! Sometimes, shit happens.

Brookelina said...

Mel's turn!

1. Which is worse - chronic bad breath or a teeny weenie?

2. Describe the most embarassing outfit you have ever worn.

3. You are gay for a day. Who is your girlfriend? Why?

4. Does Tom Cruise need therapy? Why or why not?

This next one was taken from vivalasvegas. I think it's obvious why I am using it.
5. Would you be the national spokesman for an adult diaper if the money was right?

Melanie was here said...

I am all over it! I will have to post my answers tomorrow as I am off to look at a new house plan!

petrow said...

I would love to be interviewed, not blown, or eaten, just interviewed

petrow said...

p.S , i LOVE THE BLOGG ON THE LIE SCALE , TOTALLY GENIUS,

HOW ARE THESE FOR YOU :

" IN NEVER INHALED "


" I WASN'T LOOKING I HAD A CRINK IN MY NECK, HONEST "


AND ONE OF MY FAVS: " YOUR THE BEST I HAVE EVER HAD"

YOU'VE BEEN LONKED TO MY BLOG, HAVE A WICKED DAY

Brookelina said...

Petrow - I just checked out your blog and you have already been interviewed! Besides, that picture scares the crap out of me.

Thanks for the link! And those lies don't count - so you're fine!

Merovingienne said...

Interview me too! :)

Ruben said...

Interview me. God I'm such a sheep! lol

Diedre said...

I'd like to be interviewed too, please.

Brookelina said...

Crap.

Ok, I'm working on it!

Brookelina said...

Merovingienne

1. Astrology - fact or fiction?

2. If you were an animal, which one would you be?

3. What is the coolest thing that you own and why.

4. Would you rather win an Oscar, Emmy, or Grammy?

5. It's your last day on earth. You can have sex with anyone in the world you want - who is it?

Brookelina said...

Ruben -

1. Hot chick coming over to your place for a date. What do you do to prepare?

2. Who is your hero? Why?

3. Which would you wrestle - an alligator or a great white shark?

4. Rock star or movie star? Why?

5. If your friends were going on the Maury Povich show and they asked you to be on with them, would you go? Why or why not?

Have fun!

Brookelina said...

Diedre -

1. Someone hands you $50,000 - what do you do with it?

2. You are the newest Disney Princess. Who are you and what is your story?

3. What was the best vacation you ever took? Describe it.

4. Aerosmith or the Rolling Stones?

5. If you had to hunt and kill your own food, would you become a vegetarian?

The Moviequill said...

would you like to do me?..no that is not a direct question, I mean interview me? ask away and I'll pop back later

Brookelina said...

MQ - yours is all Hollywood!

1. Jennifer Garner or Jennifer Lopez?

2. Pitch me a story starring the Brat Pack as they are now. Describe the story and the characters. (if I just gave you your award winning screenplay idea, I want a thank you at the Oscars!)

3. Do you practice your Oscar acceptance speech in front of the mirror?

4. What script do you wish you had written?

5. Describe the ultimate scenario for your movie - director, actors, location, etc.

MoDigli said...

I love this! Todd already interviewed me, so you're safe! :)
My answers are up.

BTW, soup and NeoCounter. What more do we need?

PS. I'm visiting SW Florida for two weeks at the end of Aug./Beginning of Sept.! Are you near there?

Brookelina said...

I'm in southeast! Where are you going to be??

yournamehere said...

Brooke,
I could have sworn I commented on this post when I came home from work. Your answers and questions to others were great as I suspected. I like to think that after our interview I grabbed your ass like I grabbed Mo's.

Kallun said...

I feel so bad asking this, but will you interview me?

Brookelina said...

You got it Kallun, if you promise to answer them on your blog! Let me get some coffee in me and I'll be right on it!

Brookelina said...

Ok Kallun - here goes. And this is it!! Probably.

1. Why do Australian barristers where those funny wigs?

2. You have moved 20 times. Is there any one place you would move back to if you could?

3. Koalas or kangaroos?

4. I noticed the 43 things list on your blog. Name 5 things you want to do with your life.

5. How are Japanese women different than Australian women?

Gordy said...

Wow, this is going to keep you busy for a while..If you get a minute, I'll have a go :-)

Brookelina said...

Gordy!

1. What does a proper Scotsman wear under his kilt? What do you wear under your kilt?

2. We both love Robert Ludlum. Which is your favorite book and why?

3. Since moving to America, what things surprised you the most about living here? What things were just as you thought?

4. Please explain haggis.

5. Everyone has something they are anal-retentive about, what brings it out in you?

Gordy said...

1. What does a proper Scotsman wear under his kilt? What do you wear under your kilt?
In both cases, Air! If you look carefully, you will see a bulge in the side of my sock, where I tuck :-)

2. We both love Robert Ludlum. Which is your favorite book and why?
Now that's tough, cos I pretty much like most of the stuff he does, although I have a feeling I am going to love the Bourne series when i get to them..I know, I know. I like to get my books second hand and did not want to read them until I have all three, so now I have them, but spend too much time blogging!

3. Since moving to America, what things surprised you the most about living here? What things were just as you thought?
The most surprising thing has probably been the lack of joined up thinking from financial institutions who have a global prescence, eg MBNA or Citibank and Equifax. It has been a nightmare as I have no credit.

I think the people have been just as I expected them, welcoming and friendly for the most part, and my Scottishness definitely helps :-)


4. Please explain haggis.
Like all traditional foods, in any culture, they come about from necessity, rather than desire. Haggis is basicall the less desirable meat products minced up mixed wing strong seasoning to hide the taste and filled out with oatmeal, stuffed inside a sheep's stomach lining then boiled. A bit like a hot dog! Waste not want not.

5. Everyone has something they are anal-retentive about, what brings it out in you?
Filing stuff on my computer HDD, and when Lorraine uses metal spoons on my saucepans!

Brookelina said...

Gordy - The Bourne Identity is the best one. I also liked The Matarese Circle and The Gemini Contenders. Ludlum rocks. Or did.

Gordy said...

I read Matrese, I linked that, not seen the other one, it just depends which ones I pick up second hand.

MoDigli said...

brooke ~ I fly into Ft. Myers and then stay in that general area at my grandma's place.

YNH ~ Now I'm ganna call you a dirty bastard! Watch out before we put you on the 3rd ladder! ;))

Brooke ~ Can you beleive he's going around the blog-o-sphere grabbing asses like that? Jaysus! ;))

WhiteBoyBob said...

Not that you'll see this comment by now, but I am so glad to read that someone else doesn't like Seinfeld. I thought I was alone in the world!

Brookelina said...

I am reading this WBB, and I'm with you! I admit there were a few funny episodes, but for the most part I didn't feel the need to watch a show about complaining and whining. I get that enough hanging out with my family!

The real me said...

Is your "Visitors to this date" counter free or part of the premium package?
I've got the free counter, but can't find anything like the "Visitors to this date" on their web site...

thanks for your help, and if you want to... you can interview me!
:)

online credit report said...
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