Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Tuesday Ten #2

Ten Reasons I Will Not Get a Cat

1-10. I'm a single schoolteacher living at home with my mother.




40 comments:

Beth said...

LOL! My daughter is also a teacher and when she was single (she's now engaged), we used to tease her all the time about being a teacher with 30 cats!

I like your blog.

Nance said...

#11-100. Cat hair.

Nance said...

#101. A box of shit in your house.

Sizzle said...

Mmmm, good thinking my friend.

miss kendra said...

that's why i'm not a teacher.

but then again, i knit... so i think we're even.

jungle jane said...

nonononononono the rule for single lay-dees is no more than two cats. Just tell people that your 'mum' is actually your secretary.

Get the cat, scarlet...make sure you name it Jane.

Princess of the Universe said...

I'm a single girl living alone- that is also my reasons 1-10 for not having a cat.

I have a few years to go before I become the crazy cat lady.

Justin said...

Dude that cat lady is hot.

Bone said...

Yeah, I think you're OK with one cat. If you get much higher than two though, it could be a little frightening.

yournamehere said...

Insert your own gratuitous pussy joke here.

Scarlet Hip said...

Beth - see, she's engaged now, so that story isn't so funny. But thanks!

Nance - both of those were on my original list. But nothing could compare to the main reason.

Sizz - I went to college and everything.

Kendra - but you dance like a wild woman, so you've got me beat.

Jane - how many cats do you have again?

Scarlet Hip said...

Princess - exactly. I'll get dogs. You never hear people calling anyone the crazy dog lady.

Justin - glad you like her. That could be me in 30 years.

Todd - you said insert. heheh

Übermilf said...

You know what's worse than a cat and/or cats? A yorkie poo.

Danielle said...

you are tooooooo funny! LOVE the visual. you should definitely go for a pupper... actually, screw it, go for whatever makes you happy!!! i love crazy cat ladies (as long as they are not within smelling distance)!

Melissa said...

I'm single and have five cats. Really, I'm not so much a stereotype as a walking punch line. ;)

/\ said...

wow. this must mean you're easy, too.

tequilacon cannot get here fast enough, miss wose.

jiggs said...

cat lady goes back in time! cat lady! she fights kitty crime!

ChickyBabe said...

#115 - one for her and one for you.

Scarlet Hip said...

Ubie - if you ever see me with one of those, send me in for a lobotomy.

Dani - I'll get the dog eventually. Then it will be ok to get a cat. The dog will offset it.

Melissa - please tell me they are outdoor cats. That's the only way I'll be able to handle this new information.

Brando - you've known I'm easy for years. You must have forgotten now that you are clean and sober. When the hell is Tequilacon!!

Jiggs - yes! Song! Do a song!

Chicky - ha!

Justin said...

You're going to turn yellow too?

Think Frustrated said...

When I was a teacher, I never liked the term, "Schoolteacher." You don't teach schools, you teach kids. You're a "Kidteacher," not to be confused with "Kidtoucher." I guess the two are pretty close. "Hi, I'm a kidteacher." "What? A kidtoucher?" I guess teacher works. You should have 20 cats by now.

Bizarro-Flounder said...

I love cats. They taste like chicken.

Bill said...

I had a cat (Gonzo) for 19 years! I was the crazy cat man! Now I'm the crazy dog man - Molly's a boxer mix (whatever that means) but they say she may have Dalmatian and/or border collie in her.

She's entertaining, though. Yesterday she put on an interesting performance when she freaked out over a turd that was half in her ass, half out.

You won't see that on network TV!

Therese said...

Well, I can see how that would be a deterrent.

But kitties are adorable.

Tits McGee said...

You're delicious.

Scarlet Hip said...

Justin - that's a whole other issue.

Jacob - I hate you.

Flounder - that may be my favorite comment from you, ever.

Bill - remember when I said I was going to kidnap her? Forget it.

Therese - it would be great if they could stay kittens forever. Then I'd get one. Or five.

Tits - and nutritious!

sunny said...

Addendum-- you are a single schoolteacher living at home with your mother -- and saving lots 'o money like a smart cookie.

But then I have two silky terriers in diapers, so I have no business making comments here.

Melliferous Pants said...

My parents have a cat...so I guess that means I have a cat too. I think I'll be okay as long I don't start knitting sweaters for him and can refrain from making him a myspace profile.

Rrramone said...

Ok, you had me at "Simpsons Icon", but I laughed out loud at your reasons. :-)

Susie said...

hahah i love it! and totally understand your reasoning. a dog could work though...just saying.

Sysm said...

Fuck it. One cat is sane.

Two cats is questionable.

Three cats. Run. For. The. Hills.

Mone said...

I'm not a catwoman at all, so I dont need a reason, hahaha.

I like the new look :)

Scarlet Hip said...

Sunny - you are lovely, but I think an intervention is in your future.

Pants - it's your parents' cat. Doesn't count! Wait, you live at home now too...hmmm.

Rrramone - hello stranger! Don't laugh, I'm on my way to becoming her.

Susie - oh a dog is a definite. After I move out. And get my own house. And get a job. And find a guy to pick up its poop.

Sysm - I have a friend with three cats. But she's a single mom so we give her some leeway.

Mone - thank you! And I'm not a catwoman either. But I do so love that outfit...

thephoenixnyc said...

Babeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!! Oh how I have missed you. I'm back from China baby. THis is a hilarious post, as always. Muah!!!

Justin said...

How far are you from her hairstyle?

Scarlet Hip said...

Phoenix - you say that to all the girls.

Justin - remember, you don't like older women.

matty said...

Yes! Yes! Thank you for writing this! It is important for everyone to know and understand!

...I love cats, but there are just times in life when it can be quite tragic to get one!

Cats at the wrong time can bring upon a doom of bad scents, over size sweaters, tea and no sex!

This is true for women and men.

...just my opinion.

Bill said...

I becoming quite adept at picking up dog shit. Just like working in an office again.

I highly recommend dogs ... except on rainy days like today when they smell like, well, dog.

GrandPooOfAwesome said...

Aw...but cats are supa fantastic.

naynayfazz said...

Cats are great but I see your point. You can visit mine if you'd like.