Sunday, April 09, 2006

We Interrupt This Program...

...to bring you a special news bulletin. Brooke's much needed and well-deserved spring break began on Friday at 3:30 pm. She has been extremely exhausted from spending most of her free time for the last five weeks at the hospital with her mother. In early March, her mother had back surgery to repair a disc, and she has endured one doctor fuck-up after another. There is no way to know when she will be released at this point.

On Friday evening, at approximately 10:00 pm, Brooke was informed that her oldest brother (who will be referred to as B1 from here on in) had a massive heart attack in New Jersey and is in the ICU. The family has decided it would not be prudent to tell Mom about B1's condition at this time. Brooke will be flying up to NJ to check on B1's condition this week. She and B2, B3, and B4 are currently trying to figure out ways to handle the stress of another family member in a health crisis, what to tell Mom about B1, how to explain Brooke's absences from the daily hospital visits, and how to get through all this without their collective heads exploding.

Brooke's rubber band is about to snap. She thinks telling Mom that she fell in a hole and can't get out would be a swell idea. In fact, she already has the shovel and the perfect place to dig, so it really wouldn't be a lie. If you wish to find Brooke for the next few days, she will be hiding in her hole in the dirt until the all-clear signal has been given and this nightmare is over.

Please send food. Thank you.


www.nataliedee.com

"I'm not coming out, and you can't make me!" - Brooke

43 comments:

Anonymous said...

brownies, doughnuts, ice cream, and a big chocolate Godiva martini.

I am so sorry. I'm sure I'm not the only one who will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts. I hope all of our collective positive thoughts and energy will somehow make it easier for you. Blessings and (((cyberhugs.))))

Bill said...

Well, that does it. I'm not going to blog squat here this week. Geez ... how many mirrors did you break? This is getting absurdist.

I'm really sorry all this is going on. A hole is a good place to be now. I don't have food to send but if you need toilet paper let me know. I can toss down a roll or two.

Princess LadyBug said...

A shipment of chocolate covered strawberries and frozen margaritas will be delivered shortly by the heterosexual division of the Chippendales Stripper Delivery Service.

Just in case, I also took the liberty of calling the fire department to come out and help feed you. I requested that they only send the ones on the calendar. Apparently March, June, & October are free and on their way but they didn't have time to change out of their swim trunks since they were at a local beach party.

Hope that helps. Keeps us posted, honey.

yournamehere said...

Oh, Brooke, I'm so sorry, my dear.

I am now hugging it out with you, metaphorically speaking.

When this all resolves itself for the best, you need a vacation. And I unselfishly DO NOT recommend Vegas. I suggest a non-Florida beach, a pitcher of margaritas made by someone who fucking knows how to make them, and a cabana boy named Enrico who works on his abs as much as I blog.

Take care.

Thérèse said...

Ohhh, Brooke, that sucks.

Damn.

Well okay, let's see. You'll need some curtains... a nice comfy lazyboy... little minifridge stocked with liquor and good food... coupla TRNs... Yep. I'll be sending that care package to the hole ASAP. I will also send a nice sexy man who does not speak English but will be happy to do nothing but hm-hm-hm in the hole. If you know what I mean.

**hugs**

darth said...

i'm bringing over the creme brulee.

ChickyBabe said...

I'm sorry Brooke. Sending warm hugs to you.

babyjewels said...

Oh man Brooke. I'm so sorry. I wish there was something I could do. I'll be thinking of you.

Knitty Kitty said...

oh sweetie, i'm so sorry.
I'm sending tim-tam flavored hugs and loads of love.

flounder said...

You have got to be shitting me.

Broke honey, my heart is just breaking for you. I hope that mom and B1 are feeling better, and the tide starts to turn for you soon.

A bucket of rocks and a plate of oysters at the Greenie at a time of your choosing baby. Just say when.

Anonymous said...

Oh, I am so, so sorry.

Megan said...

Sending a big hug from CA.

JillWrites said...

I'm very sorry that you and your family are going through this. I would be more than happy to send food. And hugs.

Maddie said...

I don't blame you one bit for wanting to hide out. I'm so sorry B.

Mone said...

I'm sending you a big hug and lots of lots of energy to make you feel better...

Janet said...

"See the Sun" by Dido. Listen, Listen!

Dan-E said...

forget blogging. you need a vacation from life. hang in there brooke. i'm sure banal cliches are the last things you wanna hear (or rather, see) thing are gonna get better. i'll say a little prayer for you.

you drama queen.

katarina said...

Damn. I hope everyone is feeling better soon. I'll start digging the hole. There will be plenty of food waiting for you.

dizzy von damn! said...

i'm sorry lady.

i am surreptitiously baking you mind brownies right now.

they should be arriving any minute.

please enjoy. i have laced them with the good stuff.

(hugs)

Scarlet Hip said...

Thank you all for your good wishes. Believe me, they are much appreciated.

I spoke to B1 on the phone. He sounds much better than I expected. I'll be flying up on Wednesday.

Mom is rallying and seems to be in good spirits. We haven't told her about B1 yet. Probabaly tomorrow. Oy!

Keep up the good thoughts, it's really helping!! Love you all.

Mackenzie said...

Eat cake. Lots of cake. There really is no other option at this point.

What a shit storm! I would have pulled the covers over my head and gone completely nutzo by now. Be strong and dig hard.

Unknown said...

Here's wishing you one large pizza pie and a pitcher of ice cold beer.

Chris "Chickenwing" Quigley said...

Brooke, I have no food to send down into the hole (Except for some mystery candy from Halloween 2004) so instead I will send all my reserves of good vibes and industrial strength mojo your way.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dave said...

Friggin' life. Good luck with everything, Brooke...

egan said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
egan said...

Ouch, I see this hasn't been a good break. So sorry to read this. This summer you better party like a rock star.

I hope things work out with the family Brooke.

jiggs said...

that sucks nards. You're a hot babe and obviously you don't deserve any of this stress.

Perhaps you can take solace in the fact that one day we're totally gonna do it.

if necessary, I'll send bacon. And also some beefcake!

Fella said...

I've got you and your family atop the pate. Think positive and stick together and you guys will be alright.

Hypersonic said...

Sending soothing thoughts from Brazil. Hope B1 gets better and sue the godamned doctors about your mum.

Sizzle said...

holy crap! i am so sorry to hear this. i hope your brother and your mother get better soon. thinking good thoughts.

Spinning Girl said...

I am thinking of you.

Bill said...

Glad to hear B1 is better than you feared. Hope the rest goes well. Toilet paper is in the mail. It's at least 90% unused.

Chelle said...

Keeping good thoughts for your family and you.

I am sorry.

flounder said...

So you've removed me from your blogroll? Wow, you must be pissed.

Does that mean no bucket of rocks at the greenie this summer?

Tumbleweed said...

Brookie, I am soooooooo sorry. I am sending some good luck your way right now.....there, I hope that helps!! *big hug*

thephoenixnyc said...

I am so sorry to hear this news Brooke. I will prya for his speedy recovery.

Melanie was here said...

Hang in there Brooke. If you feel like coming over to Cleveland I'll pamper you for the rest of your spring break....breakfast in bed, dogs to cuddle, wine service beginning at noon, you get the picture. Hell, I'll even have the hubby perform butler stuff.

Seriously.

kris said...

Oh Brooke. I'm thinking of you and hoping you are making it through as best you can. Take the time you need - your faithful fans and friends will be here when you return.

flounder said...

BTW - Coach Devenny from ACHS died this past week. His sons are good friends of mine, though I am unable to make it down there for the funeral.

jiggs said...

yay for rallying and good spirits!

Loz said...

Brookelina - you most definitely need a holiday when you get through this, and a holiday that is all entirely about YOU. i'm sure your mum appreciates everything you're doing for her, and i hope everyone is back to normal ASAP.

Ubermilf said...

I'm sorry I missed all this -- I took a week off of the computer.

I hope everything's okay. I feel shitty for not responding.

KJ said...

Sorry to hear about your family. Come to Japan for a real holiday once it all sorts itself out.