Tuesday, June 27, 2006

When All Else Fails...

My brain is working at zero capacity. Fortunately I found this meme over at Lemorse's. Consider yourselves tagged.

1.You are in the Witness Protection Program and must invent a new first, last, and middle name. What is it?
Luscious Babycakes Mcgillicutty.

2.You are in a threesome with two famous people, alive or dead.
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.

3.You are in charge of naming your new band. What's the name of the band?
The Asshats.

4. You are going to get a free tattoo. What would it be?
Either an anklet of rosebuds or an arrow on my tummy pointing to my hoo hah.

5. You are being forced to listen to one song over and over, ad infinitum, as a form of torture. What song is it?
Anything by Mariah Carey.

6. You are leaving your state/province. What state do you move to?
The Garden State.

7. You are leaving your country, where would you move?
I'd bounce back and forth between Italy and Australia.

8. You get to choose one book as the best ever written. What book do you choose?
To Kill a Mockingbird.

9. You get to choose one movie as the best ever made. What movie do you choose?
Casablanca.

10. You get to spend one day each as a bird, an insect, and a mammal. What bird would you be? What insect? What mammal?
A seagull so I can torment the shoobies back home. A spider so I can make grown men scream like little girls. A dolphin so I can kick some shark ass.

11. You must relive one year of your life. Which would you like to relive?
1991. And this time I won't let him slip through my fingers.

12. Which year(s) would you least like to relive?
Anything after 1991.

13. You have a time machine that will take you backwards anywhere from 1800 to the present. What decade do you most want to visit?
The roaring 20's. Flapper dresses, hot jazz, and bathtub gin. I'm so there.

14. You must choose to go skydiving or very-deep-sea diving.
Can't I just have root canal instead? Fine, deep sea diving.

15. You get to return to the past (using that handy dandy time machine we were talking about before) and have a sexual encounter with a rock star who is no longer alive. Who do you pick?
Michael Hutchence.

16. You get to be a contestant on any game show, airing today or in the past. What show do you want to be on?
Family Feud. Good answer!! Good answer!!

17. You are given $1 million dollars but you must give it all to one charity. What charity do you choose?
The Ms. Wose Educational Fund.

18. You must ban one word from the dictionary and all usage, to be no longer uttered or written. What word do you ban?
Canoodle.

19. You can have 100 million dollars tax-free but if you take it, you'll die at the age of fifty. Do you take it?
No way. I look forward to being old and gray and poor.

20. There is no number 20.


36 comments:

Anonymous said...

Can TOTALLY relate to your answer to #11...for obvious reasons.

Anonymous said...

Was michael hutchence the guy from INXS? Didn't that guy kill himself by strangling himself while spaking the monkey?

Anonymous said...

Re #11: Man. I want to hear more about this guy. It sounds intriguing!

kris said...

please Please PLEASE let me be an Asshat.

Wait, did I just write that?

flounder said...

You could always donate that jack to the United Flounder College Fund.

Remember, A mind is a terrible thing.

Lushy said...

My answers are not sufficiently different than yours to warrant posting it on my blog. The only real difference is the witness protection name. Let me introduce you to Luscious Sweetcheeks McFarland.

Scarlet Hip said...

Betty - good to see you! And yes, I understand completely.

TF - I don't care what he did or how he did it, I saw him in concert and he was the sexiest thing I'd ever seen. Ever.

Sunny - maybe someday I'll tell the story...

Pauly - but would that stop you from taking her home and doing rude things to her? God, I hope not.

Kris - oh sweetie, of course you're an asshat. You don't even have to ask.

Flounder - you mean your mind is a terrible thing.

Lushy - oh sweetcheeks. So much better than babycakes! Damn!

Mackenzie said...

Canoodle sounds too much like a desert.

Bill said...

How about Asshat and Tails? I'd be a Tail.

Bill said...

And I took your meme!

flounder said...

I'd take the million and die at 50.

After all, we aren't promised a minute in life and a guaranteed million to live out my remaining 16 years would kick ass.

Um, we are guaranteed to make it to 50 in this scenario, right?

Chris "Chickenwing" Quigley said...

I love that you used "hoo hah" in a sentence.

You are a goddess.

jiggs said...

Luscious Babycakes Mcgillicutty. I will name my third child that.

Also: good answer! good answer!

Mone said...

hahaha, I just love - The Asshats, hahaha ROTFL

Anonymous said...

Showing my geeky pedantic nature - a spider is an arachnid, not an insect. That answer would have been all right if they'd asked what arthropod you'd like to be.

I'm sorry, I can't help it. It's a form of OCD I have.

Melanie was here said...

Who is Michael Hutchence?

Scarlet Hip said...

Blonde - which just makes that word annoying and a tease!

Bill - what? You don't think you're an asshat?

Flounder - I'm sure your newborn son will appreciate your sacrifice. See you in hell Flounder.

Sleepy - I've also been know to use the word twat.

Jiggs - and what will you name one and two?

Mone - well there ya go, you're an asshat too!

WBB - when I become a spider I'm going to crawl up your pant leg and bite you on the ass.

Melanie - Michael was the lead singer of INXS. I saw them play in Sydney and I have never seen such a sexy front man in my life. The way he moved...oy!

Unknown said...

Every time I think about going back to the past, I remember they didn't have air conditioning and I blow it off.

Ubermilf said...

I have no creativity available to craft a response to this meme.

Bill said...

Sure I'm an Asshat. But I wanna be Fred Astaire!

Chris "Chickenwing" Quigley said...

Brooke, my head might explode just thinking about how cool you are.

Never change.

Ever.

Lo Lo Lova said...

DANGIT! Now I've been working on this all day. Trying to come up with clever answers. It's tough, man. But I think you'll appreciate my #2.

Scarlet Hip said...

JJ - blow it off. Do you know what that means in Australia? Hehehe.

Ubie - you are excused.

Bill - how about "Asshats and Cowlicks?"

Sleepydog - you are so easy.

Anita - in this scenario I am rich, so I'll be flying back and forth on Jon Bon Jovi's personal plane.

Lo Lo - let me guess....Jon and Jason?

Lo Lo Lova said...

One of those is right.

Cactus Prick said...

I was going to tell you that spiders aren't insects, they're arachnids. But some asshat beat me to it.

egan said...

I really need to read To Kill a Mockingbird again. What a great book it is.

yournamehere said...

I'm glad to be able to read you again. Yes, moving back to Kentucky made me temperarily illiterate. No, I just didn't have a computer. Really.

jungle jane said...

i like your new name Brooke. that would definitely make you inconspicous.

Bill said...

Asshats and Cowlicks. I like that.

mernitman said...

oh -- oh -- wait -- I get it -- Asshats -- you meant: Not the Dickheads!

matty said...

I want a tat of Hello Kitty on my butt. The idea amuses me.

Spinning Girl said...

This is so utterly fabu!

Spinning Girl said...

p.s. It's because of you-know-who that we liberally use the word "hoo-hah".



Sigh.

jiggs said...

barry and sandra

JillWrites said...

Yes, sign me up for #7, 11 (same reasoning, different year), 13, 15... especially #15.

Maddie said...

I want to be with you in the roaring 20's!!