Deca-dent

I found this on someone's blog ages ago. I don't remember whose it was, but I saved it for just such an occasion (the occasion being that I can't get my head together enough to write a good post). Feel free to steal.

Deca-dent
Ten seconds ago I was taking a sip of coffee in my new office.
Ten minutes ago I was making a pot of coffee in my new kitchen.
Ten hours ago I was sleeping in my new bed in my new bedroom.
Ten days ago I was preparing to move in to my new house.
Ten weeks ago I was house hunting.
Ten months ago I moved back to Jersey to be a teacher.
Ten years ago I moved back to Jersey to be a professional chef.
----- ----- -----
Ten years from now I hope to be as happy as I am now.
Ten months from now I will be about to obtain my Master's degree.
Ten weeks from now I will be starting summer break!
Ten days from now I hope to actually start blogging on a regular basis again.
Ten hours from now I will be having Chinese food for Passover.
Ten minutes from now I will head out to spend obscene amounts of money for my new house.
Ten seconds from now I will take a sip of coffee in my new office.

"I tried to push her out a window in Little Rock once."

I saw this on Sizzle's blog today and being that I haven't had an original thought in weeks I love movies, I thought I would give it a go. Here’s how it works, should you decide to participate, too:

* Pick 15 of your favorite movies.
* Go to IMDB and find a quote from each movie.
* Post them on your blog for everyone to guess.
* Fill in the film title once it’s been guessed.

These are your rules:

* Leave your guesses in the comments.
* No Googling or using IMDB search functions. Don’t cheat!


1. "I've been specializing in groups, fighting gangs for local charities, that kind of thing."
The Princess Bride* - guessed by Rich.

2. "We're in the pipe, five by five."
Aliens - guessed by Dan-E.

3. "Do you spend time with your family? Good. Because a man that doesn't spend time with his family can never be a real man."
The Godfather - guessed by Dan-E again, and he even got the right character.

4. "Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body exploding at the speed of light."
Ghostbusters - guessed by Sizz!

5. "You cannot leave everything to Fate, boy. She's got a lot to do. Sometimes you must give her a hand. "
Ever After - guessed by Princess of the Universe.

6. "How do you shoot the devil in the back? What if you miss?"
The Usual Suspects - guessed by Tim, sort of.

7. "May I have ten thousand marbles, please?"
Animal House - guessed by Todd.

8. "At least he is not a book burner, you Nazi cow."
Field of Dreams - guessed by Bill.

9. "I'd bet they're asleep in New York. I'd bet they're asleep all over America."
Casablanca - guessed by Bill again!

10. "This is good stuff. I got it from a Negro."
Caddyshack - guessed by Ubermilf.

11. "You're not getting this back. I consider it asshole tax."
Fight Club - guessed by Hilly.

12. "It vexes me. I'm terribly vexed."
Gladiator - guessed by Penelope.

13. "You Americans, you're all the same. Always overdressing for the wrong occasions."
Raiders of the Lost Ark - guessed by Nick.

14. "I shall call him squishy, and he shall be mine, and he shall be my squishy!"
Finding Nemo - guessed by Penelope again!

15. "Ned, I would love to stay here and talk with you... but I'm not going to."
Groundhog Day - guessed by guessed by Todd again!

Bonus points for getting the title.
Paper Mooon - guessed by Cajunvegan.

Ready....set ...go!

*Best. Movie. Ever.

Cable Lineup December-January

I know I haven't been blogging much lately. I'm not going to make excuses other than to say I've been busy. Being an international superspy is arduous work. Something had to give. And so the blog suffers. But alas, that hasn't stopped the freaks from tracking me down via keyword searches. Thank goodness.

The Food Network

• boiling point of tampico juice
• fat women stomping on grapes
• men are like grapes
• what will make me go poop?
• you are the last drink i never should drunk
• sticky toffee pudding in new jersey

The Discovery Channel

• what means museltov
• gay siblings
• virgo indecisive
• top 10 reasons why sex sucks
• what is my relationship destiny

E! Entertainment News

• "gerard butler's home"
• gerard butler ass pic
• viggo girlfriend
• gerard butler penis
• gerard butler rude

FOX

• human for sale cup size
• almost famous tattoo

Playboy

• video thin titless
• ball kicker girl fetish
• windows naked flashing
• accidental flash
• circumcised men with his teeth rhyme
• flashed on purpose
• bolt upright and the erections
• songs in the key of sex
• i'm an exhibitionist flash
• accidental flash girl

I'mTooBusyHere'sAChristmasSong

NaBloPoMo

Today is the start of National Blog Posting Month - otherwise known as NaBloPoMo '07. The basic concept behind NaBloPoMo is to post every single day for the month of November. That's pretty much it. I thought it would take longer to describe it but apparently not. There may be some prizes involved but I'm not sure - I didn't really look into this too deeply. I've wanted to do this in the past but something always seemed to get in the way. For example, I was unable to participate in the NaBloPoMo of '05 because nobody told me about it. Also, I'm not really sure that there even was one in '05. I missed out on the NaBloPoMo of '06 because I think I was busy doing stuff. However, I am now throwing my hat into the NaBloPoMo ring of '07. It's all very exciting.

I am doing this because A. I have been a fuck-all lazy blogger of late and 2. How in the world can I expect my movie star boyfriends to find me if I don't keep this blog updated on a regular basis. If Viggo Mortensen decides to find out who his girlfriend is this year, it's important that he get this information directly from me. If Gerard Butler wants to learn more about the size of his penis, then I feel that the particulars should come from someone who is willing to explore this topic in depth. If nothing else, I am a dedicated and loyal make-believe girlfriend.

I figure I'll run out of things to say by about mid-month, at which point I will commence posting pictures of kittens and lists of things that piss me off.

Stay tuned.

The Name Game

I stole this from Todd. I have no excuse other than my mind is elsewhere these days. And I'm lazy. And I'm in a writing rut.

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet & current car)
Marigold Toyota

2.YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (fave ice cream flavor, favorite cookie)
Hazelnut Oreo (Yeah, not so tough)

3. YOUR “FLY Guy/Girl” NAME: (first initial of first name, first three letters of your last name)
B But (I'm using Butler as my last name here - for when I marry Gerard. Best to be prepared I always say. Plus it's a much funnier name this way.

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)
Red Dog

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)
Alison Atlantic

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first)
But Br (See? Much funnier)

7. SUPERHERO NAME: (”The” + 2nd favorite color, favorite drink)
The Purple Margarita

8. NASCAR NAME: (the first names of your grandfathers)
Mark Eddie

9. STRIPPER NAME: ( the name of your favorite perfume/cologne/scent, favorite candy)
Tommy Bahama Snickers

10.WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother’s & father’s middle names )
Joan Lewis

11. TV WEATHER ANCHOR NAME: (Your 5th grade teacher’s last name, a major city that starts with the same letter)
Surran Sydney

12. SPY NAME: (your favorite season/holiday, flower)
Autumn Rose - Todd and I are twinsies!

13. CARTOON NAME: (favorite fruit, article of clothing you’re wearing right now + "ie" or "y")
Watermelon Flip Floppy

14. HIPPY NAME: (What you ate for breakfast, your favorite tree)
Muffin Fig

15. YOUR ROCKSTAR TOUR NAME: (”The” + Your fave hobby/craft, fave weather element + “Tour”)
The Cooking Thunder Tour

Restaurant Meme

I've been forced to do a meme. Forced I tell you! Blame Todd. Everyone else does.

The rules:
1. Add a direct link to your post below the name of the person who tagged you.


Include the city/state and country you’re in.
Nicole (Sydney, Australia)
velverse (Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia)
LB (San Giovanni in Marignano, Italy)
Selba (Jakarta, Indonesia)
Olivia (London, England)
ML (Utah, USA)
Lotus (Toronto, Canada)
tanabata (Saitama, Japan)
Andi (Dallas [ish], Texas, United States)
Todd - The Forcer (Louisville, Kentucky, United States)
Brooke (Fort Lauderdale, Florida, United States)

2. List your top 5 favorite places to eat at your location.

3. Tag 5 other people (preferably from other countries/states) and let them know they’ve been tagged.

So here are my five favorite places to eat in Fort Lauderdale. It's nice to be doing this since I'll be moving away from this hellhole lovely place in the sun in the very near future.

Heart Rock Sushi - absolutely my favorite place in Fort Lauderdale. Not outrageously expensive, always clean, friendly service, and a great menu. And if you aren't into raw fish, there are plenty of other great things to eat that are actually heated to a proper temperature. The Spider Roll is to die for. Also, a shout-out to the Sushi Rock, mostly because it was the first place I went on a date after I moved to Florida.

Franco and Vinnie's/Il Mulino - two completely different places but both equally good Italian food. Il Mulino may have the best fried calamari I've ever had, including my own. It is also the only place outside of Italy where I will actually order spaghetti. Franco and Vinnie's has a special for two of Shrimp Scampi, Fettuccine Alfredo, and Chicken Piccatta that is absolutely orgasmic. Great pizza too.

Trina - this is one of those ultra-hip and trendy beach front hotspots. I don't go here very often as I am neither ultra-hip nor trendy. Also, I am poor. However, this is my favorite place for brunch - hands down the best Eggs Benedict in the free world. Or at least South Florida. Big ups for great service as well.

Rustic Inn - two words. Garlic. Crabs. So phenomenal you won't mind the noise or the service. What's better than newspaper covered tables, wooden mallets, pitchers of beer, and huge trays of crabs? Nothing. They even have a huge sink on the porch to wash yourself down with after you've doused yourself in garlicy buttery crabby goodness. Mmmmmm...you know you want some.

Southport Raw Bar/Kelly's Landing - these two places are in my neighborhood and both have amazing seafood. Southport is the place to go to have a few beers and fried anything that once swam. Kelly's is a little place right out of New England - with absolutely perfect steamed lobsters and wonderful service. The waitress there even gave me a discount because I'm a teacher - gotta love that!

Also, special mentions:
Zona Fresca - cheap Mexican food that is always fantastic. The place is always spotless and always mobbed. The boyfriends love it, so you know it's good.
Bimini Boatyard - sit out on the deck and watch the boats go by. Great spot for drinks and appetizers.
And I have to mention my favorite place in Boca - Uncle Tai's - for phenomenal Chinese food. Expensive, but worth it.

So there you have it, my favorite places to eat here in sunny Fort Lauderdale. I usually don't tag - but since it's in the rules I'm legally obligated.

I tag Egan, Rich, Chicky Babe, Michael, and Sizzle. I highly doubt any of them will actually answer the tag.

Bon Appetit!

K is for Kinky

Your Girl Parts Are Named:

Breakfast of Champions

Girl Parts Name Generator

Your Boobies' Names Are...

Dessert and Dinner

Boobie Name Generator

What Brooke Means

B is for Bubbly R is for Refreshing O is for Outrageous O is for Optimistic K is for Kinky E is for Enchanting

What Does Your Name Mean?

I love that not only are my girlie bits named for food - appropriate since I used to be a professional chef - but I once wrote a post called "Breakfast of Champions" as well (see sidebar). Ok fine, it's a Kurt Vonnegut novel, but I still come up on page three of Google searches for that phrase. Suck it Kurt!

You Would Think I'd Have More Dates Considering...

Your Kissing Technique Is: Perfect

Your kissing technique is amazing - and you know it. You have the confidence to make the first move. And you always seem to know what kissing style is going to work best. Sometimes you're passionate, sometimes you're a tease. And you're always amazing! Are You a Good Kisser?

AND

Your Wrestler Name Is...

Jade Filthy Lips What's Your Wrestler Name?

Good to Know...

You Are 12% Sociopath

You're empathetic, loyal, and introspective. In other words, there's no way you're a sociopath... but you can spot one pretty easily! Are You A Sociopath?

I'll Be on the Couch

Don't cook.
Don't clean.
No man will ever make love to a woman because she waxed the linoleum.
"My God, the floor's immaculate! Lie down, you hot bitch."
~Joan Rivers

Lists of Stuff

I got this from Flounder. Thanks babe!

10 Favorites
Favorite Season: Fall
Favorite Color: purple
Favorite Time: early evening
Favorite Food: cake!
Favorite Drink: gin and tonic, extra lime
Favorite Ice Cream: hazelnut gelato
Favorite Place: Jersey Shore
Favorite Sport: Football
Favorite Actor: Robert DeNiro
Favorite Actress: Drew Barrymore

9 Currents
Current Feeling: relief
Current Drink: iced tea
Current Time: 6:30 pm
Current Show on TV: Generation Renovation
Current Mobile used: Cingular
Current Windows Open: Yahoo, Outlook, ebay
Current Underwear: oops...
Current Clothes: pink pajama bottoms, white tee shirt, pink UGG slippers
Current Thought: How much longer is this thing?

8 Firsts
First Nickname: Brookie
First Kiss: I honestly don't remember
First Crush: Richie H. - kindergarten
First Best Friend: Lori F.
First Vehicle I Drove: Datsun 510 - yellow exterior/green interior
First Job: babysitter
First Date: Jimmy C
First Pet: dogs named Sweetums and Sundance

7 Lasts
Last Drink: morning coffee
Last Kiss: my two year old nephew
Last Meal: onion soup my neighbor Mark brought me (no, he's not gay)
Last Web Site Visited: The Sydney Morning Herald
Last Movie Watched: In Her Shoes
Last Phone Call: my neighbor Mark
Last TV show Watched: Law and Order reruns

6 Have You Ever...
Have You Ever Broken the Law: yes
Have You Ever Been Drunk: yes
Have You Ever Kissed Someone You Didn't Know: yes
Have You Ever Been in the Middle/Close to Gunfire: yes
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: yes
Have You Ever Broken Anyone's Heart: yes

5 Things
Things You Can Hear Right Now: the tv, my neighbors bringing in their groceries, a yacht docking outside, people barbecuing on the patio, my tapping fingers on the keyboard
Things On Your Bed: 4 pillows and a stuffed animal
Things You Ate Today: bagel, fruit, cheese, carrots, hummus
Things You Can't Live Without: friends, family, computer, bubble baths, candles
Things You Do When You Are Bored: I don't get bored

4 Places You Have Been Today
my bedroom
my bathroom
my kitchen
my living room

3 Things On Your Desk Right Now
iced tea
telephone
coaster

2 Choices
dog or cat
move or stay

1 Place You Want To Visit
Bora Bora

Green Day

You Are Teal Green

You are a one of a kind, original person. There's no one even close to being like you. Expressive and creative, you have a knack for making the impossible possible. While you are a bit offbeat, you don't scare people away with your quirks. Your warm personality nicely counteracts and strange habits you may have.

What Color Green Are You?

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Today is not only St. Patrick's Day, but also the fifth anniversary of my father's death. Typical Englishman, had to go and spoil the only Irish holiday we celebrate here in the States. And a fun one at that. Here's to you, dad.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Catching Up

So I have to catch up on all the fun stuff I missed out on the last two weeks. Shut up, I'm too lazy to write a real post. However, before I go on - I want to thank everyone for their kind words and messages while I was gone. And I would especially like to thank the many people that sent me such lovely emails and Instant Messages - I won't name you all because:

1. I'm lazy.
and
B. I don't want to embarass you all.

Just know that I truly appreciate all of you who showed me the love.

On to the nonsense.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Judge me, please.....

Please visit my Johari Window. Even while I was gone I did all of yours. Your turn!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Been there, done that......

You Should Date An Australian!

You're a down to earth, outdoorsy kind of girl And you need a guy who can keep up with your adventures A rugged Austrailian guy is just your style Better start learning how to surf!

Which Foreign Guy Should You Date?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Say it ain't so!

You'll Find Love Online

Dating in meatspace is way too complicated and time consuming for you You rather find a ton of guys at the click of a button So go on, and have some fun in your online dating adventure Just make sure perfectguy@mrright.com is who he says he is

Where Will You Find Love?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I feel much better now.

100th Post

It's my 100th post!

For this prestigious occasion, I am officially requesting a comment orgy.

Go for it.

Questions, Comments, General Concerns

Idea stolen from nonvocabulum.

Shoulda Gone to Law School

Click here for The World's Shortest Personality Test.

You are elegant, withdrawn, and brilliant. Your mind is a weapon, able to solve any puzzle. You are also great at poking holes in arguments and common beliefs. For you, comfort and calm are very important. You tend to thrive on your own and shrug off most affection. You prefer to protect your emotions and stay strong.

What Flavor Am I?

I'm packing for a trip to Jersey, so no time to write a real blog. So many ideas!!! My mind is a-glow with whirling transient nodes of thought, careening through a cosmic vapor of invention. My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought, cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.

Ok, so I stole that from Hedley Lamarr. I'm also stealing today's blog idea from Jeff Haines. Thanks Jeff!

According to this website -
I am Chocolate Flavoured.
I am sweet and a little bit naughty. I am one of the few clinically proven aphrodisiacs. Sometimes I can seem a little hard, but show warmth and I soon melt. What Flavour Are You?

Not in the mood for chocolate?
I alsho tashte like Alcohol.
Heh. Heh. I taste like beer. I like beer. Buy me a beer. I'm not drunk, I can drink plenty without... What was I saying? Beer. What Flavour Are You?


Mmmm....I like chocolate. I like beer. Two great tastes that go horribly together.