Once again I found an irresistible meme on some random blog. However some of the questions were quite boring, so I changed them. You probably won't be able to tell which ones I changed.
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1. Were you named after anyone? Yes. My Uncle Morty.
2. When was the last time you cried? Last night watching Gladiator. Why does he have to die? Why??
3. Why are you so fickle when it comes to men? I am not! Who said that!
4. What is your favorite lunchmeat? Ham twat! Turkey twat! Lunchmeat twat!
5. Do you have kids? I have 20 kids every day. Isn't that enough for you people?
6. If you were another person would you be friends with you? Yes, I’m a delightful person to be around.
7. Do you use sarcasm a lot? Of course not. That would sully my delightfulness.
8. Do you still have your tonsils? I do. I am trying very hard to keep all my innards where they belong.
9. Would you bungee jump? Would I like to jump off the top of a bridge with a rope tied around my ankles? Sure. Afterwards I could roll around on some broken glass and then sit in a tub of vodka.
10. What is your favorite cereal? Captain Crunch! No, Lucky Charms! No, Apple Jacks! Actually, I have Grape Nuts and oatmeal in my cabinet. I hate being a grown up.
11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? I have people to do that for me.
12. Do you think you are strong? Yes. Me strong.
13. What is your favorite ice cream? Hazelnut gelato. Preferably from Florence, Italy. So if you want to take me out for ice cream, it's going to cost you a bit more than you expected.
14. What is the first thing you notice about people? Their smile. And their teeth. Then if it's a guy I check the abs. Usually with my hands. I really shouldn't be allowed out without supervision.
15. Red or pink? Depends on what we are talking about. Red can have scary connotations if it's something that is supposed to be pink.
16. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? That I torment my blogfriends with these incessant memes.
17. Who do you miss the most? Her.
18. What color pants and shoes are you wearing? White holey sweatpants and pink Ugg slippers. It's a fashion statement. It says, "It's Sunday and I’m a lazy slob."
19. What was the last thing you ate? Rye toast with slabs of butter. *Note to self: start diet tomorrow.
20. What are you listening to right now? Yellow Ledbetter by Pearl Jam. The most incoherent song ever performed. Fabulouslessness.
21. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Red Rose, of course.
22. Favorite smells? The beach, hot coffee, freesia, citrus, fresh baked bread, him right out of the shower.
23. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? I just got off the phone with my friend who invited me for sushi tonight. How considerate of her to call so I could have a ready answer for this question. I'll have to buy her some shrimp.
24. Hair color? Medium Auburn by L’Oreal.
25. Eye color? Medium Brown by Mom and Dad. (Oh and I'd like to take this opportunity to thank my Dad for not sharing the green-eyed gene with his only daughter - and while we're at it a special shout out to Mom for hogging the blond-haired gene as well)
27. Why aren't you married? Shut up! I'm so sick of people asking me this question. I'll get married when I'm damn good and ready!
28. Favorite food? You don't want to go there. It could take all day.
29. Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings. Always always always go for the happy ending.
Interpret that as you will.
30. Last movie you watched? Babel - and if you want to know what i thought of it, look up "suckfest" in the dictionary. Just get Crash if you want to see a good movie about intertwining lives.
31. What did you dream about last night? Something about being a Spartan sex slave...it's still all very hazy...
32. What book are you reading? The complete works of Shakespeare.
Seriously, I am. Shut up.
33. Summer or winter? In Florida there is no winter, and I'm sick of it. So I'm going with winter. Yeah, you can remind me of this next year when I'm freezing my ass off in Jersey.
34. Hugs or kisses? I refuse to give up either one.
35. Favorite dessert? Sticky toffee pudding.
36. Do you have any special talents? Oh I do. I do I do.
37. What are they? If I wanted to answer that question, I'd have done so in number 36.
38. What color shirt are you wearing? Pink, to match my slippers. I may be a lazy slob, but that doesn't mean I can't be color coordinated.
39. When are you going to start preparing for your move back home? Shut up.
40. What did you watch on TV last? HGTV.
41. What is your favorite sound? The ocean.
42. Rolling Stones or The Beatles? People are still asking this question? Seriously, get a life.
43. What is the farthest you have been from home? Sydney, Australia. Or Hong Kong. Whichever is farther. Look it up.
44. Most likely to respond to this meme? Nobody.
45. Least likely to respond? Viggo. He's still not taking my calls. I think he's upset about the whole Spartan thing.
37 comments:
Enjoyed your stuff!
Holy Moly! There's 45 of 'em. I can't do a meme 45 questions long. That's like a government form.
But thumbs up to Shakespeare. The last one I read was Twelfth Night (for the gazillionth time).
I may rewatch Kenneth Branagh's "Much Ado About Nothing" tonight - I love it.
Hmm ... I seem to have wandered off on a tangent.
Hi. I stole 33 of them. You did MUCH better than I. I hope you don't call the Blog Police about my theft.
Peace-
Seriously woman, we are twins separated at birth. Yellow Ledbetter! Florence! 20 kids a day (well, 96 ... but still). You rock my socks, Brookelina.
oh, and we both watched Gladiator last night.
God damn it, every time I comment on your blog I get to the end and it makes me sign in with my google account and erases the fucking comment.
For god's sake, switch to new blogger already. There isn't a prize for the last old blog on Earth; I checked. I had a brilliantly hilarious comment and you're getting this pissy complaint in it's stead.
Wow! This was cool!
I may have been named after your Uncle Morty as well. Not sure, tho.
I will research this and let you know.
I'm not sure what I loved more: learning more about you or being distracted from the heinous essay responses on the 71 honors am. lit. tests i am currently slogging through.
i'm guessing you improvised #3, 4, 5, 27, 31, 39? Oh, and stay away from that Cap'n Crunch. That stuff is weapons grade. What it does to the roof of a mouth...serious damage. Crush it up and use it as breading for chicken, though. Delish.
Why is your blog suddenly written in Spanish?
Rick - thank you!
Bill - you don't have to do the meme, you know I never tag people. But it might be a good way to get you to focus.
Bud - I will not call the blog police. Just give me the credit that I didn't have the courtesy to give to the person that I stole this from.
Spinning Girl - I know, it's freaky. When I get back to Jersey we have to meet up somewhere. NYC maybe?
Todd - why should this pissy complaint be any different than all your other pissy complaints?
Did you ever have the hazelnut gelato from the little place on the Manly Wharf? I think it gives those Florentines a run for their money... wait... I think the people who own it are from Florence. Oh well, it's great stuff anyway.
Matty - we might be related then! How cool!!
Nance - and I was writing this instead of grading the stack of book reports on my desk. Granted they are only four sentences long, but still...
Tracy - tell Todd he's a tool. Oh, and thanks for coming by!
Rich - don't get me started on the Manly Wharf. You do know that I used to live in Manly, don't you?
I don't trust anyone with my shoes enough to hire them to take them off me. I would need to see references.
Mist - you have an unnatural obsession with your shoes. It's disturbingly hot.
No I didn't actually. How on earth did you get home each day without buying gelato?
Hola, amiga! Como estas?
Uno OTRO meme? Tu es triste.
i've got a gladiator....IN MY PANTS!!!
since when has being able to stuff 5 grapes up your nostrils considered a "special talent?" and no, cooking while chewing gum isn't special either. learn something else.
you're delightful. you're delicious. you're de-lovely.
also, they're always after me lucky charms. And by "lucky charms", I mean, my "grape nuts"
Beware #8. Trust me on that one.
Also, how does the gravel-like consistency of grape nuts produce such a creamy delicious desert like grape nut pudding?
I'll never figure that one out.
I'm little concerned about Turkey and Ham Twat...
I'm hoping that there's another meaning where you are! Because, and trust me on this, you wouldn't want a Turkey or Ham Twat.
I think you used some sarcasm in your bungee jumping question. Oh man, isn't hazelnut gelatto the best? I could eat gallons of that stuff a day.
you are teh adorable.
After you finish your book, go rent "Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead."
LOVE that movie.
And BTW, what do you pay your shoe untiers? Are they Union?
Rich - it's been more than a few years since I lived in Manly, so I doubt the place you are talking about was there then. You'll have to fill me in on what part of Sydney you live in. Oh how I miss it there!
Ubie - non mi rompere i coglioni.
Jamwall - that is so hot!
Dan - you will never know the wonder of my special talents. And believe me, that's a loss.
Jiggs - we should come up with a new cereal. Lucky Nuts!
Flounder - what is this Grape Nut pudding you speak of? I must know.
Egan - no matter how many flavors of gelato there were in a given shop in Italy, I would get hazelnut. I think I tried it in every shop in the country.
Kendra - right back atcha.
Cactus - I will add it to my Netflix queue post haste. By the way, where the fuck have you been?
Ah yes, brooke. It's been a long time. A long time. Do you remember me? I went by a different name, but really? What's in a name? My name could be fagnuts but I might be the straightest guy you know.
love me
Brooke:
Godd**nit! I am too late to the meme thingy! I do so much like your answer to number 9! And I read a review of the Sparta-movie. It talked about all the homoerotica. My response - Who cares? Babes are babes - I'm not trifling over who they want to sleep with!!
Good job, Brooke. Maybe you should turn your blog into nothing but memes. Think about it.
Yuh, the Gelatissimo is only a few years old. Oh, I live here and there...
You're kidding. I stumped the chef?
Two comments, oh Next Tabloid Darling...
1. I think the last time I cried was after watching Andre Agassi's last match. I mean... never.
2. And I refuse to eat adult cereal! I currently have Count Chocula in my kitchen.
I want to know just how old those sweat pants are. Who was president when you bought them?
So if I wanna see you in your hole-y sweatpants, I gotta come by on a Sunday? Sweeet!
You're hilarious, I LOVE your blog...found you through wordnerd in dairyland, a friend of mine. I will be returning to read more, you're awesome! :) Shut up!
Hal - I thought you were dead.
Leezer - I may do Sunday memes. That should get rid of my last few readers.
Rich - Yes that's after my time. I actually worked on the Manly Wharf for a while after I worked on the Corso. Excuse me, I'm getting misty with memory.
Flounder - how much do I love that you got that out of Yankee Magazine. Classic. Unfortunately not required reading at the culinary academy.
Bone - I knew you were gay. Dammit.
Ubie - I think it was Millard Fillmore.
Hyper - bring coffee. And danish! And the Sunday Times!
Michelle - thank you. Come back anytime! I love compliments.
Shut up.
Oh my! I do so love you. And I missed you terribly while I was in my enforced hibernation.
Ham Twat!
Our dreams as of late have been very similar. Perhaps it is the coming of spring that brings historical sex scenes to the frontal cortex.
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