Recently someone came upon my blog using the following search term:how to ask someone to a dance if your 11 and the person who you want to dance with is with someone you hate and everyone hates you in school
At first I cracked up. Brilliant, I thought. That's the best search term ever. I have to post this and share the laugh. I even searched high and low for a funny picture of a nerd trying to get a date.
But then I started remembering what it was like to be that age. Kids can be so cruel. One day you have lots of friends, the next they turn on you for someone with a cooler pair of sneakers. I wondered what it would be like to be an 11 year old so desperate for help that I would turn to Google for answers. How sad that my blog came up in the search - I'm sure I was absolutely no help at all.
And so my 11 year old friend, I apologize that my blog couldn't give you the answers you were looking for. But know this, you aren't alone. That feeling that everyone hates you - we all feel that way sometimes - even adults. Just remember to stay true to yourself, to treat people the way you want to be treated - and things will get better.You will find friends who do the same. And soon those haters won't matter to you at all anymore.
I hope you go to the dance. And I hope you get to dance with the one you "hate."
23 comments:
Way to lie to the kid that it actually gets better, Brooke.
Yeah but you treat people like shit, so there you have it.
I don't treat people like shit and it hasn't gotten any better for me.
Nick, hiding in your room with the shades drawn doesn't make it better, either.
try wearing a leather jacket and rolling up a pack of smokes in your t-shirt sleeve. It worked for the Fonz.
Nick - what do you mean it hasn't gotten better for you? You're in the middle of an Ubermilf/Brookelina sandwich. What could be better than that? There are men who would pay good money to be where you are right now.
Ubie - I have a business idea I'd like to go over with you.
I fear for the children who find my blog.
Brooke. You're very nice.
Kids are so mean. When I was twelve my best friend Lisa was targeted by the girl-bullies. I didn't help her and it haunts me to this day. As punishment, the universe gave me zits.
Alternatively, they could pester their parents to buy them a new pair of...err...sneakers? Maybe that'd work.
The very reason I stayed in the 5th grade classroom for so long... kids are cruel and they all need someone who can support them. I feel I did that for so long, for 10 yr olds. But what a truly scarey thought that some kid is actually using Google as their 'how to grow up' resource. Poor kid.
whoa..darth jr. is at a 12 years old school dance right now-I'll ask him what he thinks.
Yeah, you know, I just don't know whether to laugh or cry at that search term. Poor kid.
I dunno what yourname and nick's stories are, but I agree with you, Brooke. Maybe the world doesn't get less f'ed up on a grander scale, but it does get a hell of a lot better later on on a personal level than being an ostracized pre-teen.
Baby freaks need to know they aren't alone, they're just rare gems, and that later they'll be able to go out into the wide world and find their fellow freak scenesters. And there is nothing more beautiful than a gathering of freaks--and they ALL want to dance.
If I knew that kid was reading this I'd tell him about going back to my HS reunion. Going back there years later and seeing how everyone turned out was a real eye-opener. All the people who were most popular in HS were boring as hell as grownups. And all the most interesting people who had the coolest stuff going on with their lives were all the people who had been the "outsiders" in school (or at least not the uber-popular ones).
Hang in there, kid!
I loved this post!
And, you know, it has gotten better for me. I'm happy at 40. I was not at 11.
I hope things start to improve for Nick. ...he was in a hot sandwich!
Everyone hates me too. Maybe that was my 11 year old self that was sending a message to me from the past via your blog... my head just exploded.
Mist - I fear for the children who find your blog too.
Leezer - I'm not so nice. You should have seen the post I originally wrote.
John - well done. That's actually the American way.
FH - that's exactly what went through my mind after my initial laugh. I try to hammer into my first graders that being mean is unacceptable. I just hope some of it sticks.
Miss Syl - ignore Todd and Nick, they live to complain. I never bothered going to my high school reunion. I was popular then so I figured I'd now be the one they all looked down on.
Matty - I was happy as a child, but I remember well how little girls could be. And little boys. Even then it's survival of the fittest.
Jiggs - that is so deep.
That's what she said!
You do realize, don't you, that now you've given Google an idea? In addition to GoogleNews, GoogleGroups, Froogle, now there will be "Noogle: The Nurturing Search Engine That Does Your Parenting For You." Way to go, Brooke, way to go.
Think there'll be an IPO?
You're so right about how cruel kids are. I remember being 11 and for a few glorious months being best friends with the coolest girl in class...
Then suddenly she got bored and I was invisible to everyone until grade 6.
Then I got boobs....
"I was popular then so I figured I'd now be the one they all looked down on."
Maybe the former nerds who organize a cruel prank at your expense; like make you think you were having sex with Daniel Craig in the janitor's closet when really it's just that retarded guy from your class in a Daniel Craig disguise. Yeah, that's it.
I once knew a girl like that...
One minute she'd hate me and the next she'd cook and clean for me.
We're divorced now.
Anyway, I'm sure your little "searcher of knowledge" will survive
I could be wrong, but I think Daniel Craig might be retarded.
in the real world, I don't think he could get a date -- and, remember, he'd not be able to afford the personal trainer!
...just sayin'!
Now, gerard. well, that is a very different story.
Katarina - hey stranger! Thank you.
Nance - story of my life. Come up with great ideas that other people make money from. I need a better agent.
Princess - boobs do tend to destroy the invisibility cloak.
Todd - I wasn't popular in the typical "everyone hates me but they really want to be just like me" way. I was popular because I was actually friends with just about everyone - especially boys - in the "Brooke's so cool and fun and we can tell her all our relationship problems" way. I was everyone's buddy. Makes me shudder to remember.
Slick - I'd hate you too if you expected me to spend all my time cooking and cleaning for you.
Matty - now is that a nice thing to say! Daniel is extremely gay friendly!
That is really sad. I hate hearing about kids being made fun of. When I was in high school, I always befriended the "nerdy" kids and my other friends would be like, (insert snobby valley girl accent) "Why are you talking to her? Whatever!"
Assholes.
I have advice for that kid:
Ask the girl you hate (but secretly love) to dance. She'll say no, which is not that bad, or she'll say yes, and then do something to embarrass you. So what. No biggie. Just be you. Eventually (probably in college) you'll meet other people like you, who like you, and everyone else can fuck off.
Where'd all that old angst come from? (skinny nerd with glasses whose last name is "Gross.")
I'm so sorry I was sick during this precious post. I love this.
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